MOMS’ STEP DOWN

“Motherhood is a calling” according to Stormie Omartian. What are you doing with your call?

Definition of motherhood

 The state of being a mother; maternity.

 The qualities or spirit of a mother.

 Mothers collectively.       (Dictionary.com)

I like the second definition as it justifies the reason for this book. There are women and there are mothers. Permit me to say that “being pregnant for nine months and delivering safely is not sufficient to call you mother. You must have the qualities or spirit of a mother. This is what I have tried to itemize and explain in the simplest of terms here.

Dads are the head of the home. Scripture affirms the headship of the man and unless we want to hit the rock as women, it is quite pointless to argue with that. The man was created first and then THE WOMAN FOR THE MAN. I dare to say that if there was no man there will be no need for the woman.

Genesis 2 vs. 18. “Now the Lord God said, it is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him”.

The need for the man not to be alone gave rise to the creation of a woman. Feminist and equality seekers may not agree but the truth is; this was God’s original plan and it still is.

How can we even dare to fault God and his plans? We need a reminder of how it was meant to be. Every day we see women who are taking charge of their lives and the lives of those around them. Some through no fault of theirs really. Life has thrown them the responsibilities of men. Absentee fathers, present but not present fathers, men who are too lazy and unreasonable have turned some women into men. As unfortunate as these situations are, it is still not how it is supposed to be. On the other hand, we have women who have refused to submit to the headship of men.  They have come to the conclusion that they do not need a man. Some of these women look down on homemakers and make them feel like they are worthless, when indeed they are the ones fulfilling God’s original plan for the woman.

Myles Munroe said “when purpose is not known then abuse is inevitable”. Many women do not know their purpose or major purpose for being here on earth.  They have no understanding of the reason they were created as women in the first place. I make bold to say that our calling and major purpose here on earth is to complement the man. To be a companion for him. Let’s try to define the word God used in the book of beginnings.

Genesis 2 vs. 18 “Helper”. A helper is a person who contributes to the fulfillment of a need or furtherance of an effort or purpose. Contributor not controller.

One of the most frequently misunderstood terms in the bible is the term “help meet” in the book of Genesis.

In Genesis 2:18 it says, “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”

The common way in which the term “help meet” is interpreted is to mean that Eve, unlike the other beasts of the earth, was “appropriate for” or “worthy” of Adam and was to be his helper or companion on the earth. While there are some really good things about this interpretation it doesn’t do full justice to what the term “help meet” really means. The term, in the original Hebrew, means something much more profound and powerful than just a “helper” and when we understand what God was saying to Adam, we come to see Eve’s role and the role of women on this earth in a much different light.

In Hebrew the two words that “help meet” are derived from are the words “ezer” and the word ‘k’enegdo”. Ezer which is commonly translated as “help” is really a rich word with a much deeper meaning. In her book Eve and the Choice Made in Eden, Beverly Campbell explains, that “According to biblical scholar David Freedman, the Hebrew word translated into English as “help” is ezer. This word is a combination of two roots, one meaning “to rescue”, “to save,” and the other meaning “to be strong.” Just as the roots merged into one word, so did their meanings. At first ezer meant either “to save” or “to be strong,” but in time, said Freedman, ezer “ was always interpreted as ‘to help’ a mixture of both nuances.”

Diana Webb in her book Forgotten Women of God also clarifies this word by explaining,

“The noun ezer occurs 21 times in the Hebrew Bible. In eight of these instances the word means “savior”. These examples are easy to identify because they are associated with other expressions of deliverance or saving. Elsewhere in the Bible, the root ezer means “strength…. the word is most frequently used to describe how God is an ezer to man. “

For example the word “ebenezer” in 1 Samuel 7:12 is used to describe the power of God’s deliverance. “Eben” means rock and “ezer” means “help” or “salvation“. Ebenezer therefore means “rock of help” or “rock of salvation”. The root “ezer” is the same word that God used to describe to Adam who Eve was. She was not intended to be just his helper or his companion; rather she was intended to be his savior, his deliverer.

The other part of the term “help meet” which is commonly translated as “meet for” or “fit for” is the word “k’enegdo”. It is hard to know exactly what the word k’enegdo means because it only appears once in the entire Bible. Yet Diana Webb explained that,

“Neged, a related word which means “against”, was one of the first words I learned in Hebrew. I thought it was very strange that God would create a companion for Adam that was “against” him! Later, I learned that kenegdo could also mean “in front of” or “opposite.” This still didn’t help much. Finally I heard it explained as being “exactly corresponding to,” like when you look at yourself in a mirror.”

While all of us are called to be helpers to others, the Bible places a special emphasis on this responsibility for wives. Genesis tells us that God realized it wasn’t good for man to be alone, and that He decided to make a “helper suitable for him” (Gen. 2:18).

Eve was not designed to be exactly like Adam. She was designed to be his mirror opposite, possessing the other half of the qualities, responsibilities, and attributes which he lacked. Just like Adam and Eve’s sexual organs were physically mirror opposites (one being internal and the other external) so were their divine stewardship designed to be opposite but fit together perfectly to create life. Eve was Adam’s complete spiritual equal, endowed with an essential saving power that was opposite from his. So why do t women keep seeking equality? Is it for lack of the knowledge of God’s original plan or for rebellion against it? I have pondered a lot about this clarification of Eve’s role and how it is that she has been given a saving power equal but opposite to Adam’s saving power. As I’ve thought about it I realized that while women do much to help and assist men in their stewardship, they have been given a stewardship that is uniquely theirs and which is every bit as important as men’s stewardship.

It is interesting to note that the Hebrew meaning of the word helper in this passage is found hereafter in the Bible to refer only to God as He helps us. The fact that this same word is applied to a wife signifies that we women have been given tremendous power for good in our husbands’ lives. God has designed wives to help their husbands become all that God intends for them to be.

Women are “saviors” to men by the fact that they give them life and nurture them towards the light of Christ. By conceiving, creating and bearing mortal bodies, women make it possible for God’s children to start on their mortal journey and have the opportunity to become perfected. Without women there would be no gateway into this world and no opportunity for progress or exaltation. In addition, by being willing to sacrifice (their very lives if necessary) to bring children into this world, women demonstrate the true meaning of charity. From the very first breath a child takes, he or she has been the recipient of charity and unconditional love. This is a powerful gift that a mother gives her child and it is her love which first reminds the child of God and points them towards Christ. Each woman, regardless of her ability to give birth, is a savior to mankind when she loves men and nurtures a child closer to Christ.

What are the synonyms used to qualify this helper?

• Underboss
• Help
• Deputy
• Aide
• Facilitator
• Event planner
• Prompter
• Enforcer
• Subordinate
• Supporter
• Accomplice
• Underling
• Birthing coach
• Pawn
• Instrument
• Manakin
• Manikin
• Right handman
• Subsidiary
• Chief assistant
• Mannequin etc. (synonyms.com)

The mother also is the heart of the home as the man is the head. All of the adjectives above indicate that being a helper is a huge calling. Myles Munroe once said that “a woman is an incubator; she incubates the vision of her man”. She was created to HELP him further his calling and vision. To join hands with him and build a home that is an example of what God’s love is here on earth. The head and the heart are incredibly vital to the functioning of the body and the successful operation of a home.

The idea that only the head does the thinking is now an antiquated concept. Researchers have discovered that the neurons which store memory with which we think are not only in the brain, but also in the heart. Scripture agrees with this concept.

As a man “thinks in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7).

So this is not a book that puts down women. It seeks to reiterate the fact that we are important because the heart is as important as the head.

Our purpose on earth does not mean we are “less important”. Being a mother, helper, homemaker, raising kids and building a Godly home is our first purpose on earth. If you become a career woman, a CEO, a board member, a fashion icon and a world class business owner. It is all good. However, all that is secondary. Our Primary purpose would be defeated if the home front is in jeopardy because of these careers.  

Sometimes, in the course of helping the vision of a man, a woman may be required to sit at a board or work long hours, or be the father and mother (in the case of absentee fathers). However, as long as we stay in the purpose of “helping” while at it, all is fine. But the moment we chose to become the BOSS instead of the “UNDERBOSS”, we are set for disaster. I hear women say well “one of us has to lead”. If the man is not able or willing to, then I have to become the boss. That is the reason this book comes with a first part “Dads step up” I believe that if men will take their rightful place as heads, a lot of women would be content to step down and live within their callings as helpers.

Moms step down!